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Frequently Asked Questions
What is Divorce Mediation?
Why Should I Use Mediation?
When Should We Start Mediation?
How Long Does It Take?
Why is a Mediator Helpful?
Do I Need a Lawyer to Use Divorce Mediation?
Is There a Risk in Using Divorce Mediation?
Are Mediation Sessions Confidential?
What Are The Costs of Using Divorce Mediation?
Will I Get A Better Settlement In Court?
What Is Divorce Mediation?
Mediation is an efficient and inexpensive procedure for reaching fair decisions. An impartial mediator assists two individuals in to make fair and equitable agreements.
As many divorcing individuals are unsure of the financial and legal aspects of divorce, your mediator will insure that you receive the legal and parenting information necessary to create the best possible settlement suited to your individual needs.
At the end of the mediation, the mediator prepares a document, the legal Divorce Agreement, which is filed in the Massachusetts Family and Probate court.
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Why Use Mediation For Your Divorce?
The benefits of using mediation for your divorce include:
- Significant cost savings and reduced tax liabilities
- The ability to negotiate a settlement within a cooperative atmosphere
- An explanation of finances, so that each person fully understands the consequences of each decision
- Greater control over your decisions
- Protection of the rights and interests of each individual
- Privacy as you work out an agreement
- Assistance in keeping emotions from financial decisions
- A procedure for gathering the required legal information
- Agreements that are understood by each person and will continue throughout the life of the agreement
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When Should We Start Mediation?
You may use our services before or after you separate.
We recommend that you start divorce mediation prior to your separation, in order that the mediator helps you to make good decisions and avoid mistakes. For example, a mediator can create a good temporary parenting arrangement, calculate the correct amount of child support payments according to the Massachusetts Child Support Guidelines and assist in determining responsibility for rent or mortgage payments.
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How Long Does Mediation Take?
Several factors influence how long it will take to reach a final settlement.
- The number and complexity of assets and liabilities
- Your understanding of choices and options for each asset
- The degree to which you and your spouse agree on each aspect of the settlement
The length of time, however, is determined by the divorcing individuals, rather than the Family and Probate Court, which does not intervene in this process.
In every case, a mediated divorce settlement is reached in less time and less acrimony than adversarial negotiations. Once finalized, these agreements are lasting, final, and provide for future changes.
By comparison, an adversarial divorce can easily take two years before a final settlement is hammered out, and once finalized, often results in frequent future court hearings as one or both parties seek to modify the settlement terms.
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Why Is a Mediator Helpful?
There are two main reasons:
First, most individuals do not have the specific knowledge necessary for making fully informed decisions about the financial and legal aspects of divorce.
Second, even in the best of circumstances, the end of a significant relationship involves such intense emotional turmoil that makes if difficult for two people to resolve issues without professional help.
A frequent observation is that mediation is the closest to a do-it-yourself divorce settlement - you make all the decisions but have the security of professional assistance. The mediator insures that you are fully informed about your legal and financial options.
A divorce professional will insure that your interests and goals are valued in the negotiation, and that your final settlement is fair. The mediator will draft a divorce agreement that will be approved by the court.
Massachusetts Child Support Guidelines
Massachusetts Alimony and Property Division
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Do I Need a Separate Lawyer?
The mediators at Diane Neumann & Associates are attorneys, with the exception of Dr. Cooper. Although you are always welcome to hire an attorney before or during mediation, you do not need another lawyer in order to reach a mediated divorce settlement. The mediators at Diane Neumann & Associates will help you reach an informed and durable settlement and write a Divorce Agreement that will be approved by the Probate and Family Court.
If you choose legal representation, the mediator will work with your attorney to help maintain a cooperative and fair negotiation.
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Is There a Risk in Using Mediation?
Mediation is a voluntary process. You do not give up any rights or settlement options by using mediation and you are always free to pursue other legal remedies, which means that you can retain an attorney for advice and/or to petition the Probate and Family Court.
Mediation gives you the option to privately negotiate a settlement without the large investment of time, money and emotion that adversarial divorces almost always require.
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Are Sessions Confidential?
All mediation sessions are fully confidential, according to Massachusetts State Law, Chapter 233, Section 23c, which provides for the mediator/client legal privilege.
Massachusetts State Law, Chapter 233, Section 23c
"All memoranda, and other work product prepared by a mediator and a mediator's case files shall be confidential and not subject to disclosure in any judicial or administrative proceeding involving any of the parties to any mediation to which such materials apply. Any communication made in the course of and relating to the subject matter of any mediation and which is made in the presence of such mediator by any participant, mediator or other person shall be a confidential communication and not subject to disclosure in any judicial or administrative proceeding; provided, however, that the provisions of this section shall not apply to the mediation of labor disputes.
"For the purposes of this section a "mediator" shall mean a person not a party to a dispute who enters into a written agreement with the parties to assist them in resolving their disputes and has completed at least thirty hours of training in mediation and who either has four years of professional experience as a mediator or is accountable to a dispute resolution organization which has been in existence for at least three years or one who has been appointed to mediate by a judicial or governmental body."
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What Costs are Involved in Divorce Mediation?
Mediation costs are based on a per hour charge, which is specific to each mediator. The per hour charge is the fee for both of you, and applies to the time your mediator is specifically focusing on your case. Because you are hiring one professional instead of two and the process itself is direct and efficient, the cost of a mediated divorce will be substantially less than hiring separate lawyers.
The time involved in reaching a fully-informed and durable divorce settlement depends on at least three factors:
- The assets and liabilities in the marriage
- The level of financial and legal knowledge of each of you
- The extent to which you both understand and agree on the items that are required as part of a divorce settlement
Please call to speak with a mediator, who will better help you understand the costs that may be involved in your specific situation.
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Will I Get a Better Settlement If I Go To Court?
Divorcing individuals often ask, “Won’t I get the entire house if I go to court and tell the judge what my husband did?” or “Wouldn't the judge see that I shouldn't have to pay that much child support to my ex-wife?”
Men and women who ask these questions have never appeared in divorce court. If they had, they would know that one rarely has the opportunity to tell their story in court. If the opportunity to speak is allowed, the information one thinks is essential is often not allowed into evidence.
The final court decision will most likely hinge on a technical aspect that seem absurd to someone not versed in “the law.” The goals of the judge often differ radically from yours.
The reality of a divorce court trial is that most litigants walk out of the courtroom feeling as if they have just been run over by a truck. The winner often finds his or her enthusiasm dampened by the warning they hear from their lawyer to prepare for the next legal round, when their soon-to-be-ex-spouse will appeals the judge’s decision.
An appeal means another trial, more money, and, of course, the emotional trauma that seems to have no end. Mediation offers a common-sense, less expensive and less traumatic way to reach your final divorce agreement.
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